“What type of Asian are you?”

“So where are you from? Like… originally.”

“Where are you from from?”

“I like your Asian name.”

I’m starting to get fed up with people.

I understand their curiosity doesn’t usually come from a place of ill intent.

But when I tell people I’m from NC, that answer usually isn’t good enough for them.

No — they want to know how I’m a deviation from the norm. And by norm, I mean a white heterosexual Christian (or atheist) in the US.

Even my parents don’t usually refer to Asian Americans as Americans. They call white folks “Lao Mei” or “Old American.” And Asians are automatically Asian (‘Ya Zhou Ren” or “Asian people”).

What do I have to do for people to see me as the American I am?

Where do I have to go to feel like I belong?

I don’t know. I’m just so tired of it all. I understand my cultural heritage is an important part of my identity. I understand people simply want to know where you’re from, where your ancestry goes back to. But I want to be treated like anyone else.

When I ask people where they’re from, I usually mean which state they’re from. It’s a small talk question where that answer suffices. When I meet a new white person, I don’t typically ask “What parts of Europe are your parents from?”

But somehow because I’m an East Asian woman by ethnicity, I automatically get questions and assumptions from people. And there’s only so much patience I have for people.

Just think before you say things. Like when people tell me “Your English is so good,” in my head I’m kinda like “Well, I was born here, you numbskull.”

I just ain’t having any of it.

I guess that’s part of the reason why I’m thinking about moving to Taiwan for a few years. People might be able to look past the color of my skin and try to get to know me for who I am as I am.

But maybe that’s too much to ask.

(And to answer your question, Steve: I am a Very Pissed Off And Tired Asian American. That’s the “type of Asian” I am.)