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“The fastest way to get over someone is to get under someone else.”
It’s a joke I’ve heard people mention before.
I don’t know if I agree with that sentiment, though.
I’ve been on the rebound many times after relationships ended disastrously.
They usually followed the same pattern.
We’d get to know each other. I’d fall in love with them for a unique characteristic or quality they possessed. I’d fall out of love with them for the same quality, which somehow became annoying over time.
I’d overthink myself to the point where I’d fall in and out of love with them for different reasons. Overanalyze even the smallest gestures and try to predict how long we could last.
It usually took one or two dates for me to figure out if I could see myself growing alongside someone.
With my last relationship, I could count on my ex to be consistent and reliable. Over time, though, we stagnated. I lost my feelings for him. He made a few mistakes I couldn’t forgive him for. And that was that.
I still need to work on self-love before I pursue anything else. I’m still quite a Hopeless Case (from The Boy in the Striped Pajamas). But I’ll craft my own hope by adopting a can-do attitude. That’s the best I can do given my circumstances.
I’ll keep dreaming and powering my way through life by working towards achieving any one of my many dreams.
Many of them have been deferred over time. Many have been reborn through the circumstances I go through. But I know now that I’m strong enough to make it through every fuckin’ day regardless of the circumstances I’m in.
