It’s taken a while for me to process what’s been happening in the news and all.

Part of it was this prolonged feeling of shock.

That could’ve been my mom. My grandmother. Someone I loved dearly whose life was cut short by a man who “had a bad day.”

So many what-ifs swirl in my mind, and I’m horrified by how quickly everything has returned to normal since. It was just a blip in the news, nothing more. Onto other shootings, perhaps.

But even the depth of coverage showed a lack of effort put into humanizing the victims and providing…

What does it mean to grow up? What does it mean to become an adult?

These are two questions I’ve grappled with more recently. At 26, I’m no longer as much of the idealistic, starry-eyed girl I was throughout my teens and earlier twenties. I no longer believe in limitless success and opportunity or that if you only have the courage to pursue your dreams, you’ll accomplish more than you’d believe.

I don’t know if giving up ideas like “if you work hard enough, you’ll make it” or “if you never give up, you’ll make it” or “if you network…